The Good Enough Podcast Episode 12: BrokeBois Edition

-We didn't win Powerball, so now what?
-NFL Playoff Preview
-Justin Bieber is impacting the NBA All-Star game
-All-Star voting
-Dudes washing their hands in bar bathrooms
-UberPool dating service

When Is It Okay To Go Back To Chipotle?

Easily the most important question surrounding my life at this moment.  Will there be some sort of announcement?  Is this something you just have to feel out?  Who knows.  What I do know is this decision is centered around you having an honest conversation with your butt.

Look, it's been well documented that me and Chipotle have had our differences.  Sometimes they absolutely fuck up rolling the burrito and pretend like I don't see it even though I literally have nothing else to look at and sometimes I steal their Tabasco sauce.  They are habitual line steppers and it's my duty to check them.  With that said, I keep coming back.  It's not a healthy relationship by any means, but we make it work.  

Speaking of "healthy", that FYI notice above can simply replace "supply chain" with "pooping" so everyone stops lying to each other.  If we are going to repair this relationship, it's going to have to be about honesty and you telling me that there is a very good possibility that I poop my pants minutes after I leave your establishment.  

Here's a quick guide to decide if you're ready to go back:

1) Talk to your butt and make sure the time is right for both of you.

2) Assess other burrito options around you

3) 

Tila Tequila, In The Year 2016, Has Become Very Passionate About The Shape Of Earth

Tila Tequila is not here for your facts, figures, or scientific evidence. She is here for the very hard, possibly hallucinogenic drugs, though.  Shout out to her for ushering in #STAYWOKE2016 the right way tonight.

We have a strict "Fuck Christopher Columbus" policy at WMD, but my god Tila, this shit was revealed like 500 years ago.  After the dude didn't fall off the side of Earth and we figured out satellites and what not, we put this baby to bed.  But nope.  Not on our favorite perpetually drunk Asian pygmy's watch.  Let's review the three very important questions/ideas that she brought up in her K2 fueled rant:

1) HOW CAN PLANE'S LAND ON A GLOBE, FAM?! 

Science: What?

Tila: You ever try to stand on a basketball?  Exactly.

2) WHY IS THE NORTH POLE ALWAYS IN THE SAME SPOT THO?!

Science: Are you high? Wait, never mind.  I honestly don't want to talk to you anymore.

Tila: Explains why Mrs. and Mr. Clause don't have children.

Science: I hate you.

3) TOO MUCH SUNLIGHT IMO

Tila: Turn on the light in your living room and watch what happens. 

Scientist: *Leaves room and smashes every PhD in the building*

Oh good, your standard "covering my tracks in case I'm murdered" tweet:

Wait a second..."they" as in THAT they?!  

Honestly don't know what to believe anymore.