Oh ho hum, dad's being a dick again. Let's gang up on pops one more time for trying to add a little flair into your life, little girl. What's dad's role in the toddler stages of life anyway? Provide some shoulder rides here and there? Make sure you don't die? Playing court jester when Mom is fed up with taking care of you? Maybe nose larceny isn't our "best" option, but as you can see, we don't have much to deal with. Grow up, baby.
(Disclaimer: Getting your nose stolen was the worst thing that can happen to you when you were a dumb, stupid, little baby. Completely sympathize with this girl. Horror show scenario)
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