It's Time That We Discuss The Ikea Monkey

I haven't the slightest clue on how to get a read on this thing. Like, what's your deal, little guy? Where'd you get that comically small, tailor-fit coat? Are you friendly? Do you know how ergonomic the Malm Bedroom set is? All very, very important questions that need answering.

First off, that jacket is bananas (intended) and the monkey clearly knows it. You see him leanin':

I know the look all too well. It's the lean you get when you're feeling yourself a little too much. Sidenote: really proud of the stereotypes here - Black guy skeptical and slightly terrified of the uncommon situation and presumably Asian tourist ready to snap a pic at a moment's notice.

Lastly, I love the planting yourself in Ikea move. This monkey wanted to be different. He didn't want to perch on someone's shoulder while they shopped. Abu basically did that already. Nah, this monkey wanted to establish residence in arguably the greatest place in the world to randomly establish residence.

Real talk, if I saw this:

right before I walked through the automatic door, I'd pause, turn right around, get in the car, go to the Red Lobster that's undoubtedly adjacent to Ikea and try to forget what I saw through a haze of Cheddar Bay biscuits.