A Working Man's Diary: If I Lie And Say I'm Done With Finals And/Or Law School Will I Temporarily Become King Of Facebook?

Thursday, May 10, 2012

Posted by Dub Jeezy // at 7:29 PM //

If I Lie And Say I'm Done With Finals And/Or Law School Will I Temporarily Become King Of Facebook?

Looks like I found the new surefire way to become the cat's pajamas on Facebook. Nope, not posting a "professional" model picture. Finality. People fucking love the end of anything. Tell them you finished finals--328 likes, 98 comments. Law school done? Everyone's servers might as well explode. Unfortunately, I have literally NOTHING of importance going on, so I might have to fake it.

Social experiment: What happens when I create a fake status that says I finished EVERYTHING? Legitimately every type of school and I could possibly take.

Here's the status:

While I fell short of the "like" amount I thought I'd get, the fact that this received any reaction (sarcastically or not) is fascinating. For a span of roughly .01 minutes, I was the king of Facebook. People saw the word "finished" and three exclamation points and a switch flipped. No one questioned how one man could complete 20 years worth of school in 3 years--it was just pure recognition of accomplishment. It's moments like this that I think the world is going to be alright.

PS. Patting myself on the back for the precision I applied to blocking out my name.