I'm Not Not Excited For John Carter

^just a couple ape-mammoths, Rigs? Pfft, not a problem.

So I think I joked myself into wanting to see John Carter. Not something I'm proud of, but definitely not the worst thing that can happen.

I'm just as excited as anybody else to see a Star Wars Episode I-Avatar-Clash of The Titans-Friday Night Lights knock-off that features Tim Riggins bludgeoning ridiculous creatures with boulders. I mean where can it go wrong?

Charismatic Main Character? Check.
-Texas Forever. We're Going To State. I'm Shitfaced At 2:30 PM On A Wednesday. Garrity.

Outrageous Quote That Winds Up Being Awesome After 20+ Listens? Check.
"I did not start this. But I will end it!"--Implies that he just happened to stumble into some bad shit and took it upon himself to fix it. Noble.

This Thing? Check

Swag. #Leggo

Catch me in the theater this Friday. I'll be in the front row with my Dillon Panthers letterman on and three packs of Black Valley Gummy Bears.