Kids Are Creating Complex TI-84 Games Now

I think we were all set with "Snake" and "Brick Breaker" on our TI-83 graphing calculators. Shit definitely started going awry when Super Mario Bros. was introduced into the fray. When you're completing quests, gaining XP points, and are emotionally engaged in the experience, the game most definitely shouldn't be played on your calculator.

This nerd up here essentially took what I just said, shat on it, and lit it on fire because this is the most intricate calculator game to ever be created. Dude was fighting clearly distinguishable giants and wolves out there. Dealing damage, collecting gold, and buying shields and shit. Maybe I'm some bitter old dude, but I was completely okay with running a square polygonal line around the screen collecting other squares to become a larger, harder to wield polygonal line. That's all it really took to get me through a boring math class. When I got frustrated, I broke some polygonal bricks to blow off steam. Zero thought, even less time commitment.

Real talk, I'm jealous as shit. I would have 100% failed most classes, played no sports, and wouldn't have hooked up with girls, but I would have a had a blast with this game. Rocking orcs in the grill with a mace-having no date to the prom-avenging the king's death-getting swirlies in the bathroom.

Hell, I'd do it.