For A Measly $10,000 You Can Have Your Very Own Japanese McDonald's Wedding

Hear that sound? That's me sprinting down the street spitting aggressive game at every chick I see in hopes that one is dumb enough to Japanese McDonald's marry me.

Talk about gamechanger huh? You're telling me I can marry a woman, crush a double quarter-pounder, and crack some of the finest orange Hi-C bubbly all in the same place? It's almost too good to be true. AND you're telling me my wife can rock a not at all ridiculous red or white balloon gown too:

Start the proceedings and consider me engaged to a woman to be named later. Also consider my savings account empty, because I'm putting in my full payment today. Can't let such an amazing opportunity pass me by.

If I can somehow rock Grimace cuff links, I'm motherfucking getting married tomorrow. Japan is like 13 steps ahead of us in everything. First Playstations, now Happy Meal marriage.

Thanks MA-K.