Can A Brotha Get Some Leaf Raking Hands?

I'll tell you what's never been on my radar: leaves. Never cared about them, never tended to them, and was never really bothered by them. A pure non-factor feature of my life. Saying that everything has completely changed would be a DRASTIC understatement.

If I'm not out in the fake-mini yard in front of my house double scooping leaves with my rake hands, I may straight up become depressed. There are obviously some glaring issues like, "how do you put the leaves into the garbage bag?" and "how much of an asshole will I look like in these?", but once you got rake hands none of that matters. Life moves a little bit slower, the flowers smell a little bit better and each morning is a little bit brighter.

I'd be like the Edward Scissorhands of leaf raking. I'm completely aware that I'd be on the Neighborhood Watch list, but sometimes it's like they say, "You have to pay the cost to be the boss."