This Film Existed

-thanks to Unreality Mag-

Back when movies were movies, man I tell ya. Now we are in a day in age where scientists purposely teach dolphins to kill the President. Gone are the days where that shit happened by accident.

How did they execute such a concept? Is there a way to unwittingly teach a dolphin to do anything? Like, he had to slip on a banana peel, slide into the dolphin tank, attach a laser to its head, teach it how to orient itself with a laser on its head, infuse the dolphin with murderous ill-will towards the President, and arrange the President and the dolphin to meet in an ocean setting or at Sea World.

I mean, I’ve seen stranger things, but too many chips need to fall into place.