I Am Unintentionally Living the Life Of The Guy From "Super-Size Me"

-He looks how I feel.

I thought moving away from the Allston area meant no more fast food restaurants and three meal a day McDonalds binges. The area I live in has no major fast food joints except for Subway. Despite this, I am still managing to eat way too many burgers per day. I thought about it. It is currently Wednesday and without even realizing it, I have eaten 16 patties of meat so far this week. Yes, I am counting the week that begins on Monday.

How does this happen you ask? For one, I am the sneakiest fat kid you will ever see. I plow through food, sit on the couch, fall asleep, and wake up only to eat more food or ice cream. Oh, and I drink beers (woo college!). I still remain a chiseled (meh) 175lbs. Sure I have a gym membership and participate in athletics on a reasonably regular basis, but when BK drops that $1 Double Cheeseburger deal, we stop the fuckin' presses at Jeezy Co. To you readers, I am revealing myself. After every gym trip (BK and the gym are right next to each other...you architectural designing bastards), I make a stop at BK to get two Dub Cheezy's (double cheeseburgers) and some fries/onion rings depending on how I feel. Workout negated. Time wasted. Palette satisfied. Those past three sentences essentially define my life to this point.

As a pre-New Year resolution, I want to mark this week as the last week I will eat fast food (unless there is no other option) for the next 2 months. I want to really try to do this. If it means dying to prove to myself I can beat two beef patties special sauce lettuce cheese then so be it. I'll be a martyr for all the sneaky fat kids out there and let them know there is a way to do it. God dammit, I am going to try.

There is no chance this is going to work.