Man, I Miss College

All you lucky bastards out there that are saying "Oh my god, I am sooo not ready for college. I don't want to leave home yet!!", shut your god damn mouths. I'm tearing up a little bit every minute knowing that my undergrad career is officially over. The days of straight up not going to class, taking toilet paper-less shits, and the daily schemes of how to find my future wife are over. I was on the T today and saw the BU (sucks to be you) orientation going on. I nearly lost it. It was like one of those flashbacks from the "Wonder Years" or something. Memories were a flowing.

My first day at college was awful, but I would trade my best day this summer for that feeling back. A day of getting yelled at by my parents, sweating profusely, and not seeing any other freshman. Oh, the realization of living in a sophomore dorm when you are a lonely freshman. I was a bright eyed, bushy tailed, cute-ish bastard with so much promise. I look at myself now and see a weathered abused soul that, while still handsome, has had his innocence ripped away. Those great days of getting the same exact meal for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Unforgettable nights sneaking into upperclassmen parties and throwing up on their rugs. And we can't forget those Facebook friendships that we formed the first week of school that failed to materialize by the 3rd week of classes.

Random Hot Girl: "Hi, my name is Shelly Mo-"

Facebook Creep Bro: "Shelly Monroe right...uhh"

RHG: "Uhh.."

FCB: "Uhh...yea, well? Yup"

RHG: "I gotta go"

I'm depressed. Mr. Jeezy is head over heels in a quarter life crisis. I'm probably going to get a gold tooth and a Huffy bicycle to deal with it. If you're new to college, have a great fuckin' time and for those of you like myself, I am not even going to sugar coat it. It's over. We are just pretty much waiting to die.